[Ladd] One for the Grrls
I was recently visiting a couple in Fondren who have two delightful little daughters with whom I love to hang out. They're loud, proud, colorful, confident. The oldest came up to me and told me about the bedtime story her dad had been reading her about a bored princess who didn't want to take her prim princess lessons and preferred to go live with the dragons and have adventures. After telling me the story in some detail, my little 5-year-old girlfriend, the most chic little thing I know, looked at me and said, "You can borrow the book sometimes if you want."
[Spann] The Power of ‘Passion'
A year or so ago, a young man visiting my Wednesday night Bible study class relayed his encounter with a non-Christian who questioned how Christianity could be a monotheistic faith yet have a God who describes himself as three beings: the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. "He explained to me that 1 + 1 + 1 = 3, not 1," said the young man. "I had to admit that he was both clever and correct, but then shared with him that 1 x 1 x 1 = 1."
[Ask JoAnne] No License, Little Equipment
Q. I watched the "short-necked clam battle" the other night on Food Network, and one or two of the dishes they cooked up looked pretty good, and I thought I would invite a few friends over and prepare my own short-necked clam dishes, but I can't seem to find any available around here. The lady at the Winn-Dixie seafood shop didn't know what I was talking about and went so far as to say I was crazy for asking. Bruno's has closed, and I was thrown out of the Waffle House when I asked what short-necked clam dishes they had on their menu. JoAnne, just what the heck is a short-necked clam, and where do I have to go to buy some? I want to be able to say, "the short-necked clam battle is over!" in my own kitchen. Thank you for your time.
[Mimi] Hurl Rice, Not Brimstone
One day a guy wakes up and says, "You know what, today I am deciding to be gay. It will be so much fun. I'll tell my parents so they will shut me out of their lives and take away their financial support. Then the kids at school can beat me daily and scrawl death threats on my locker. And when I get older, I can look forward to an ostracized life from family, friends and church. Then there is job discrimination to contend with, unless I land that part on 'Will and Grace' or join the 'Queer Eye' guys, which kind of narrows my stereotypical career choices. And if I'm lucky enough to find love, I may be harassed on the street and in public places for expressing that love with the simple gesture of holding a hand."
[Cohen] Never Mind All That
It's official. The decision was made some two and a half years ago, but the first airings of the Bush campaign's television ads brought the strategy fully into play. The horrible events of Sept. 11, 2001 will be a central issue in the campaign to elect George W. Bush. The outcry from victims' families was fierce and immediate. Across party lines they saw the ads for what they were, a crass and opportunistic run on the deaths of their loved ones. Good for them. Monica Gabrielle, one of thousands of 9/11 widows, put it this way: "It's a slap in the face of the murders of 3,000 people. It is unconscionable." My sentiments exactly, Mrs. Gabrielle.
[Stiggers] Aunt Willa-Mae's X-Cubed Corn Whiskey
The following is an important message from Pookie Peterz of Hustlers International Inc.
[Lott] Protecting Forests
Recently passed by the Senate thanks to the strong leadership of Senator Thad Cochran and supported by President Bush, the Healthy Forest Restoration Act will be a major benefit in states like Mississippi where forests cover 60 percent of our state, account for 10 percent of all jobs and consistently compete with poultry as the state's number one agricultural product. This act will use sensible measures to ensure that wildfires like those which scorched California last year will not harm Mississippi's wildlife or human life.
Gov. Barbour, Do More Than 'Hope'
Read last issue's "No Deposit, No Return", the story that helped set off the education firestorm against the governor the week after it came out.
[Stauffer] Movin' On Up
Read about the JFP's exciting moves—from moving into new offices in Fondren to hiring a Pulitzer Prize-winning reporter.
[Stiggers] Denials Without Confessions
Network affiliates, Other Brotha/Funkee Finger Productions present "Denials without Confessions," a fresh, exciting and controversial soap opera for this spring. Here is a rough promotion/synopsis of first episode: Supa producer, TV talk-show host, herbal Viagra distributor, root doctor and investigative journalist Mo'tel Williams seeks the "buckey nekkid" truth within a scandal-ridden nation in denial.
[Ask JoAnne] Because I Said So
A. It's column time again, and I have not received any bona fide questions to answer lately. (It's not difficult, by the way, to have your questions qualify as bona fide.) But I'm nothing, if not serious about my duty, and so I'll give you answers anyway. Maybe after you read these, you'll take your job more seriously. Then again, maybe you already have.
[Lott] Protecting Gun Rights
I'm co-sponsoring a Senate bill that will protect America's firearms manufacturers and sellers from outrageous lawsuits holding them liable for crimes committed with guns. Like the tactics we're seeing employed with the homosexual marriage issue, the left is also pushing an unpopular anti-gun agenda through a few sympathetic courts, city councils and other cherry-picked venues, trying to bypass the American majority. Lawsuits by individuals and local governments against gun makers are just the liberals' latest move against gun ownership. Most law-abiding gun owners, including myself, see through it, and we're taking action to stop it.
[Stiggers] Walking Abreast in the Naked City
Hey Yawl! This is Bone-Qweesha Jones of the Hooked on Phonics Hair and Touch-up Beauty Salon proudly presenting an exclusive literature experience with the poet laureate of the street corner, Bruh Zeke Johnson, author of "The Anthology of 'Skreet' (Street) Limericks: Writings From The Walls of Toilet Stalls," currently the No. 1 best-selling book on the 7-11 convenience store rack.
[Ladd] Rest In Peace
When Dr. Monique Guillory called me and said she wanted to bring the "Without Sanctuary" exhibit to Jackson, I swallowed hard. I knew about the horrifying and controversial exhibit of lynching photographs, the images that sear themselves into your psyche and refuse to let go. I hadn't seen the actual exhibit; I lived across Central Park from it for a while in New York, but never quite got up the courage to go. But since returning home, I had looked at the 81 photos posted online; I knew this would be rough.
[Cannon] Stamp Out Black History Month
It's here again. Black History Month. "Roots" will be played over and over and over again. The Black Heritage Movie Network will show films like "Sweet Sweetback's Baadassss Song." And we'll be blessed with all those precious Black History Moments: "Madam C.J. Walker was the first black female millionaire," says the smiling local news personality. Why is that remarkable thing significant only in February? Answer: It's not.
[Spann] Road-Tested, Mother-Approved
I still remember the day I discovered my first gray hair. I was blow-drying my hair and just as I parted a new section to dry, I saw it in all its pale, wiry glory. I gasped and froze, not sure whether to jump for joy or cry out in despair. I raced from the bathroom into our home office to share my discovery with my husband. "I have a gray hair," I said with a mixture of confusion and delight. I saw him pause suddenly with his hands poised above the computer keyboard. "OK," he said tentatively. I could almost see the wheels turning in his head as he deliberated his next response. Were congratulations in order, or should he be prepared to comfort me with some lame comment about wisdom? Luckily, I broke the tension with something like "I guess I'm officially a grown-up now. This is kind of a special moment, huh?"
[Lott] Open and Ready
If U.S. military bases are to be closed, jobs lost, and lives changed, which communities should feel the heat first - those in an increasingly unsupportive Western Europe, or in patriotic, taxpaying towns in Mississippi? Well, I'm more worried about the plight of folks in Heidelberg, Mississippi than Heidelberg, Germany. The well being of America's taxpayers, our domestic economy and homeland security should take precedent. Most domestic military bases should remain open and ready.
[Whitley] ‘Movin' On Up' Not Working Anymore
The generation of African Americans that came of age during the '60s and '70s was taught that having the American dream—a job, a house, a car—was the pinnacle of success. They used every tool at their disposal, and demanded those that weren't, in the struggle to achieve that goal. And now that they've achieved it, those now-parents, most of them nicely settled into middle-class life, are teaching that same definition of success to their children.
[Ask JoAnne] God or the Devil?
<b>Q. Is it God or the devil that's in the details?
A. Now that's a full-strength question. It reminds of the tutti fruiti sauce my neighbor Sam Brooks brought me the other day. It was his grandmother's recipe, he said, and when poured over vanilla ice cream would create an "adult dessert." With that introduction, I determined to find out immediately. And may I tell you, Sam Brooks is a man of his word. If you aren't an adult before you eat his grandma's tutti fruiti sauce, you'll be one when you've finished! Believe me, she knew that tutti outranks fruiti any day of the year. If only she were answering the reader's question … .
[Ladd] Catching a Creative Wave
I've been thinking a lot about who's in charge lately. This first entered my brain because of Haley Barbour's half-hearted attempts at appointing a Cabinet that looks like Mississippi (for the record, that would be close to half black and just over half female. And a good percentage of them would be under 40. For the record). But, he tells us, there aren't enough "outstanding" women who are "qualified" for "leadership" positions in his administration. Ouch.
[Stiggers] Qweemy, Qweemy Black History Moment
The Cream-O-Wheat Foodbank Foundation's "Bigg Hott Pot in the Back for the World" presents a Qweemy, Qweemy Black History Moment by the Qweem-O-Wheat Man.
[Lott] The 2004 Agenda
In his State of the Union speech President Bush outlined an agenda which includes the War on Terrorism, tax cuts, job security and improving worker training, using our nation's community colleges. Passing a good national energy policy, a bold highway bill and preserving our military's edge must also be legislative priorities for 2004, and the American people deserve action on all these issues regardless of the partisan to-and-fro that an election year usually brings.
[Ladd] Haley's March to the Sea
On the JFP blog recently, someone asked me if I was willing to give Gov. Haley Barbour the benefit of the doubt. That question gave me pause. I think of myself as independent-minded, free of party affiliation, fair-but-tough and willing to consider many viewpoints, even as I refuse to defend any view blindly. The problem, of course, is that Barbour really pissed me off during this campaign. It wasn't because he's a Republican—duh, he gets to be, even if I don't care for today's prevailing corporate Republicanism—but because I believed he cleared a path of destructiveness through the state, a modern-day march to the sea, to get there.
[Fleming] A Brand-New Day
A rooster crows in the morning, at sunrise, to signal a brand new day, and in metaphorical essence, hope. The rooster that was crowing last week was Mississippi Legislative Black Caucus Chair Rep. Phillip West, D-Natchez. His exuberance comes from the news of the House Committee assignments announced on January 15, 2004. In the announcement, made on the 75th birthday of The Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., African-American legislators made historic quantitative gains in the Mississippi House of Representatives.
[Williams] The Easy Feeder
Weight problems are nature's perverse intersection of passion and pain. Anyone who has tried to diet knows this. But it is especially true for horses. Like goldfish, there are some horses that can literally kill themselves with one abundant meal. They're called "easy feeders."
[Stiggers] Something in the Meat Ain't Clean
In the wake of the current United States beef problem, the Lacto-Vegetarian Church International invites the public to attend an alternative nutrition, lifestyle and spiritual conference: "Something In The Meat Ain't Clean: Living the Non-Carnivorous Life." Hear the Rev. Bean Sprout of the Lacto-Vegetarian Church International deliver a profound, spiritual message titled "Soy Protein: The Fiber Of Our Lives." Listen to the Rev. Dr. Thomas Vegan III speak on the topic of "Prophetic Advertising: Cows Convince Masses To Eat More Chicken." Dr. Peanut of the George Washington Carver Holistic Health Commission of Tuskegee, Ala., will share information from his new book "Tofu as Soul Food.''
[Fleming] Storm Clouds A'Brewin
There is nothing like the honeymoon period of a governmental transition. Optimism is running rampant, public officials are cordial to each other, and controversy doesn't seem to raise our blood pressure as high. But, alas, this too shall pass, and we will be right back to normal, stabbing each other in the back, making insensitive decisions and forgetting our purpose.
[Ask JoAnne] Avoid Shopping Hangovers
Q. Do you think rampant consumerism is ruining the true meaning of Christmas?
A. My dear, dear one, whoever you are, how do I begin? Rampant consumerism can ruin anything, of course, particularly one's pocketbook. But whose rampant consumerism are we talking about? Only my own pursuits of unbridled materialism can ruin my Christmas. I'm certainly not going to let someone else's out-of-control spending spoil the best time of the year for me. Over the years I've developed a couple of rules for getting in control of Christmas spending.
[Stauffer] To Peace and Prosperity
As I'm writing this, the Dow seems to have settled into a new level over 10,000 and up about 25 percent on the year. Our abysmal unemployment numbers have seen a little improvement recently (although some manufacturing jobs would be nice), and orders for durable goods have been up in past months along with GDP growth. That's all pretty good news, and it's news that I hope translates into peace and prosperity for all of us in the new year. There is, of course, a lot of work to do—particularly in government, where the red ink flows at both the federal level and here in the state capital.
[Taylor] Isn't It Ironic?
"And I want to tell you, ladies and gentlemen, that there's not enough troops in the Army to force the Southern people to break down segregation and admit the negro race into our theatres, into our swimming pools, into our homes and into our churches."