The Weak Shall Inherit The State
A coalition of children's advocates are declaring 2005 the "Year of the Child" in Mississippi. It's about damned time. It's way past the point that we Mississippians must start standing up for our weakest residents. Young people have rights. They have needs. They make mistakes. It's not all about them respecting us; it's about us treating them with dignity and compassion and understanding, helping them instead of inflicting further harm.
[Stiggers] Please Sir, How About Some Change?
The Ghetto Science Team and the George Washing Carver Holistic Health Commission of Tuskegee, Ala., present Grandma Pookie's year-end radio address to the "peoples" from the rigged ham-radio station inside Lil' Ray-Ray's detail shop.
[Stiggers] The Pink Slip Is A Joke, Right?
Too Much Drama fo' Yo' Momma Street Corner Theatre Productions presents "Free Like Government Cheese," a one-man play by Filmo Jones.
Keep Your Eyes On The Prize
When the message came Thursday that a grand jury in Neshoba County had indicted at least one conspirator in the murders of James Chaney, Andrew Goodman and Michael Schwerner, I started screaming. Staffers bolted into my office to see what had happened to me. I could barely squeak out that the one thing I've wanted most in my adult life had come true. My hometown was facing its past that's not yet past.
[Stiggers] No Food In The Fridgidaire?
Pookie Peterz and the Ghetto Economic Development Association present the Let Me Hold Five Dollars National Bank.
[Chick] How Not To Dump A Guy
I feel that writing a "chick" column has not ruined my dating life quite enough, so I have thus pursued the answer to yet another post-divorce dating question: How do women dump men now?
Running with the Young Guns
I just typed "04" in the date for this file and then corrected myself. It's that time of year again. After our week off for the holidays, we're back and ready to take on the world, even if we can't get the year right yet when writing a check or dating a file.
[Sawyer] Replacing the Law Book with the Good Book
"Value voters" is becoming the new buzz phrase in politics. They are identified as evangelicals, fundamentalists, so-called suburban moms and NASCAR dads, and conservative Catholics. When it comes right down to it, these million-plus men and women have emboldened America's right-wing polity toward a culture guided by the ethos of a fundamentalist Christian worldview.
The Great American Experiment
Here's the column that drew the ire of Mr. Kim Wade, radio talk-show host, as reported in this week's issue.
[Sawyer] A Stroll Down Prosperity Street
"Come now, you rich, weep and howl for your miseries that are coming upon you! Your riches are corrupted, and your garments are moth-eaten. Your gold and silver are corroded, and their corrosion will be a witness against you and will eat your flesh like fire. You have heaped up treasure in the last days." (James 5:1-3)
[Chick] Monkey and Koncha
Up until, well, this week, I've been disguising a huge secret. It was a secret that could very well have affected my career and even further alienated my family (ha!), but my friends called me on this small character flaw and patiently worked me through it. Or maybe they just planned on avoiding me until January.
Dazed and Content
I'm sitting here, dazed and content, in front of my eMac, trying to reflect on what 2004 has meant to me. We're about to send the last issue of the year to the printer—the one that is on the streets for two weeks in order to give us a few days to rest and rekindle for the new year. At 40 pages, it's one of our biggest issues, yet, and it's filled with profiles of creative and influential Jacksonians, stocking-stuffer ideas, cool fashion, a breathtaking JFP interview and wonderfully designed ads for local businesses. It's got breaking news, hip-hop gossip, pages and pages of entertainment listings and details on where to celebrate on New Year's Eve.
[Stiggers] The Chrimmus Report
Bone-Qweesha Jones here to inform yawl on the holiday happenings with the "Chrimmus" Report. If you can't afford to take your kids to the mall, shop at Jo-Jo's Discount Dollar Sto', where everythang's a dollar! This year Jo-Jo will have an African-American Santa Claus for the children. The regularly scheduled Santa canceled this season because Jo-Jo laid off the parking lot security guards. And with the economy the way it is, Ol' St. Nick doesn't want to be caught in the 'hood after sundown.
‘Tis Time to Think and Drive
The JFP is joining Budweiser to present Alert Cab to offer Jacksonians free rides home this New Year's if you've had too much to drink. Please take advanage of this program. Click here to see a list of Jackson bars and restaurants participating in Alert Cab on New Year's Eve (you can also clip out the ad from page 29 of the current JFP.) Be sure to get your free voucher from a bartender at one of the participating establishments. Be safe out there, y'all, you hear? Oh, and have a wonderful time.
[Stiggers] Soylent Collard Greens and Cornbread
2057-1/2: Terrorists have contaminated half of America's food supply. Since 2005, the affluent consume basic food items such as meat, bread, milk and vegetables, while the economically challenged eat moderate rations of water and artificially flavored green wafers called Soylent Collard Greens and Cornbread. Remember: Tuesday is Soylent Collard Greens and Cornbread Day!
[Stauffer] Shop Mississippi, Buy American
I'm not a fan of Wal-Mart, and that's only been made worse by a recent Frontline episode entitled "Is Wal-Mart Good for America?" The show has made me think, once again, about the behemoth that I love to hate. I haven't shopped in a Wal-Mart or Sam's Club in well over seven years and, if the current trend holds, I never will again.
[Chick] If We Are the Body
I finally joined my Baptist church after two-and-a-half years of attendance. I can't believe that they would let such a slacker claim membership, but they are, and now I'm dreading the moment my mug is plastered on the jumbotrons to announce my arrival. Yes, we have jumbotrons. I don't know if Jesus would have them or not, but I do know that he's about the only person I would give up my vanity for. I'm telling you, this picture is hideous.
[Stiggers] Shop Local at Bruh Jo-Jo's Discount Dollar Sto'
Has life in the Bushes gotten you down this holiday season? When trying to make a dollar outta 15 cents, are you a dime away from a hot dog or two bucks away from a bed? And is yo' telephone 'bout to disconnect while waitin' on the next paycheck?
[Williams] The South Has Risen Again
"We didn't leave the Democratic Party," Southern Republicans like to say. "It left us." This statement is pure fantasy. The truth is that the Democratic Party instituted the bulk of the civil rights legislation in this country and, rather than get in step with it, white Southerners bailed out of the Democratic Party and threw their support to the Republicans whom they perceived as more in line with their Jim Crow "values." The Republicans didn't tell them otherwise.
Jane, You Ignorant Snit!
The other day, an e-mail popped up with the subject line, "tired of insults." I grimaced a bit and opened it. The correspondent first told me that she reads my paper most every week, and "I like the Free Press." But then she got to the point: "I wanted to let you know that you do have some conservative readers and I, for one, would like to read more articles by liberals that are not SO OFFENSIVE."
[Stiggers] The Souls of Po' Folk
Grandma Pookie here to promote my new book "Fo' the Souls of Po' Folk: Ghetto Proverbs and Affirmations." I want to share with the peoples 10 of my favorites:
[Stiggers] Hold On Tight, Do What's Right
Welcome to "Skreet Newz" with Bonqweesha and Pookie—the economic news magazine show for the financially challenged.
[Fry] Why Is It?
A few months ago, the rapper Jadakiss released a great song called "Why." The lyrics of the song really hit a special spot in my mind and my heart—and motivated me to write my own version.
Standing Up for the People
Don't believe the hype. Or, at least look for the balance in it.
During the special session called by Gov. Haley Barbour to pass certain economic-development bonds, Mississippians have been told incessantly by Barbour's office and the state's media that the House of Representatives has been "obstructionist." The drumbeat has been that the House is costing the taxpayers money every day they don't simply pass Barbour's bill and go home.
JFP Moving to Rankin County
Last night, as we toiled to get this issue out, Stephen interrupted some people breaking into one of our interns' cars. Fortunately, they didn't get away with much—they threw his backpack filled with school notes only useful to him into the bushes. But his window did get smashed, the police came, took fingerprints, and a bit of drama ensued. And he has a hassle to deal with today, and the emotions that go with being a victim of crime, any crime.
[Fleming] God's Will, Not Haley's, Needs to Prevail
Impasse, thy name is Haley! In a precursor to a tumultuous regular session in January, the Mississippi Legislature is deadlocked in a special session concerning the passage of bonds to stimulate further economic development in our state. While I have been a supporter of such legislation in the past, it has become apparent to me that this special session is more about making a political statement than creating jobs.
[Stiggers] Come Chill at Clubb Chicken Wing
Has the election got you down? Join the "Financially Challenged" at the hippest and least expensive place in town, Clubb Chicken Wing. As food, gas and energy prices increase, the only thing you can afford at a club these days is a chicken-wing snack!
[Chick] ‘It Ain't Me'
Praise the Lord, Jill is No. 1! Again, The New York Times confirms what we all know anyway: Southerners are the best darn writers on the planet. Now, Jill Conner Browne will try to tell you that the Sweet Potato Queens canon is not literature, but any intelligent, fun-loving woman in the South, or the world for that matter, begs to differ. If "Make me laugh and buy me sparkly things, and I am yours" isn't a timeless and cultural universal, I don't know what is. Hence, literature. I know I'm right about this.
[Parks] I'm a Decent Human Being, Too
When I first got to my precinct in Louisiana to vote, the people behind me greeted me cheerfully. They wanted to know where I go to school, what I want to be, what I thought of the rain outside. After we all realized the line we were standing in was where we'd be for almost an hour, they started comparing the wait to the lines for the Louisiana Marriage Amendment a few weeks ago, which were much shorter. That amendment passed by 78 percent of the vote, but was declared unconstitutional by a state judge on Oct. 5.
[Silver] Beware the Forces of Good
If I hear one more time, "The United States is a Christian nation," I'm going to puke. We are not a Christian nation and, as a Christian, I pray we never become one. I do not fear an overt attempt at institutionalizing Christianity as the official state religion. Such an effort would get less support than the Ten Commandments at the Alabama Supreme Court.