Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Grandma Pookie: "Welcome to the Gripe, Moan and Complain Weekly Business Report with Pookie Peterz. I'm Grandma Pookie sitting in for my very busy grandson. He's preparing taxes for financially challenged citizens, making them eligible for those long-awaited stimulus checks. Something is better than nothing.
"How about that stock market! It's like a broken-down hoopty that has gone out of control. The nation's economy is like that big ole egg falling off the wall and cracking on the ground. Can the Federal Reserve pick up the pieces and make the economy whole? I don't know. The dollar bill ain't worth a dime. Even some rich folk gripe, moan and complain about these tough times. Poor folk are as angry as Barack Obama's former pastor. Baby boomer grand-mommas are on the streets protesting the war. And evicted homeowners, in a desperate attempt for insurance money, chant ‘Burn, Baby, Burn!' as they set fire to their homes. Whooooo, wheeee!
"It's time for the Ghetto Science Team Consumer Spending report.
"Spending is low at Clubb Chicken Wing. Mixed drinks, cocktails, whiskey and chicken wing consumption plummets to 45 percent. Big Roscoe is very concerned.
"Patronage at Crunchie Burga World dips to an all-time low of 55 percent. Customers are appalled at price increases of Crunchie Burga Value Meals. Six dollars for a Crunchie Kid's Meal is just too much.
"While everything is a dollar at JoJo's Discount Dollar Store, consumer spending falls 30 percent.
"Woe is the consumer."
And evicted homeowners, in a desperate attempt for insurance money, chant ‘Burn, Baby, Burn!' as they set fire to their homes. Whooooo, wheeee! I've heard about this on the news a few times. To me, the homeowners must not be thinking straight because investigators will discover if the fire was caused by arson.