Ellington

Still Bill the Funk Doctor: "Eee-Diddy-Eye! Oooh, I'm joggin', and back on the scene with the record machine. This is D.J. Ol' Skool Pete's mentor, the king of throw-back, ain't cuttin' no slack. Just call me 'Still Bill the Funk Doctor,' the undisputed heavy-weight disc jockey broadcasting live from Clubb Chicken Wing, via the airwaves of WGSR–Ghetto Science Radio.

"Before I take you on a 'Fantastic Voyage' to a time called 'back-n-the-day,' here's my societal diagnosis and political commentary:

"As G.W.'s approval rating plummets every week, crime everywhere is rising higher than fresh dough on sunbaked concrete. And if the higher-ups are not careful, frustrated poor folk will get 'Hotter Than July' and start 'Buggin' Out' like 'Radio Raheem' and 'S-S-Smiley' trying to boycott 'Sal's Pizzeria.'

"Oui, oui y'all! Take a hint from overseas! A lot of Lil' Mookies decided to let the steam out in France. Mookie is the character in Spike Lee's movie 'Do the Right Thing.' He's the dude who threw the trash can through the pane glass after police used a choke hold to snuff out Radio Raheem. And it sure was hard for 'Da Mayor' to break up that riot! You feel me, folks?

"With all that said, join me, Pete and D.J. Itch-Gotta-Scratch and the Ointment Crew at Clubb Chicken Wing during the Sunday night Bingo after-party and disco.

"I'm Still Bill, your Funk Doctor, continuing WGSR's riot warning/hott mixx. Check out this throw-back classic 'Burn, Baby, Burn: Disco Inferno.'"