Ellington

Yeah, I know it's that time of year when we're supposed to have made resolutions and already broken or forgotten each and every one of them. And I'm not about to tell you I'm any different, but I did make one and have kept it. On Monday, Jan. 5, I made my way in the blasted cold at about 6:20 p. m. to sign up for The Greater Jackson Shrinkdown 2004.

Just to show you how determined I was, listen to this. First, I went to the Y on I-55, found a place to park, put the Club on the steering wheel, and walked briskly into the door. Once I was able to talk, I asked where to go to sign up. The sweet young thing at the desk said, "Go to the Trade Mart, ma'am." I thanked her and reversed all of those steps, driving out onto Fortification, onto I-55, and off at High Street. I turned left at the first light, then after about 100 feet found out that the gate there across from all those motels was not open, so I swooped into one of the Clarion Hotel's entrances, back out another, turned left at the light back onto High Street, and came to a stop in the left-turn lane at that new, fancy entrance to the Fairgrounds. In no time at all—ha—I was making another left into the parking lot beside the Trade Mart, only to see someone who looked like a fitness person come out carrying stuff. Could they have closed up early due to the blasted cold? I screeched to a halt in a legal parking place right beside the sidewalk.

Nope, they hadn't, thankfully. I got my form to complete, did so, turned it in for a red folder, and got directions to go around the curtain and get weighed. None of that high-priced digital-tech stuff here: It was one of those like every school child in America used to stand on at least once a year to be weighed and measured, at least in elementary school. Do they still do that? Well, I weighed in at 242, but immediately that didn't bother me because I heard the strains of the "Electric Slide" coming from over my left shoulder. More body heat to be generated—fun!

There, on the concrete floor where The Rogue used to hold those gigantic markdown sales—do they still do that?—I saw a line of multiple-shaped-and-aged ladies and an instructor behind a young man wearing headphones at a table with a CD player blaring out my fav-o-rite tune. I could hardly put down my sweatshirt and my cute little black-and-white-diamond-checked Olsen twins makeup bag I use as a purse and my keys fast enough. Before you know it, I was sliding along enjoying life electronically. Next we learned the Cleveland Shuffle—they can keep that one in Ohio as far as I'm concerned—then the Cha-Cha. I've tried to do the Cha-Cha at the Forest Hill Homecoming dance for the last few years, and I'm just not coordinated or quick enough. However, by the end of instruction, I felt the rhythm of the beat pretty good.

Now all I have to do is cut down on my intake, increase my movement and report for the next weigh-in on Jan. 15. Ya'll send me all the good vibes you can because this girl is going to need 'em. I plan to shrink down enough to look pretty good in the new karaoke top I'm embellishing with beads and sequins for the next JFP karaoke night.

It's not too late to join the 2004 Greater Jackson Shrinkdown. Just go Monday through Saturday to any YMCA weigh-in site, or starting Jan. 15, on regularly scheduled weigh-in days at any weigh-in site. See thegreaterjacksonshrinkdown.com or call 948-0818, ext. 120 for sites.

Shrinkdown the right way.
1. Drink water.
2. Increase the amount of your body movement. Get going. If you walk to the mailbox, then walk a bit past it. Put away the remote controls for a couple of weeks and walk to and from the TV, stereo, etc.
3. Start a routine and try to stick to it.
4. Eat only at the table.
5. If faced with eating when you are not hungry, learn to say no—for at least 10 minutes before you make the decision to eat or not to eat.
More tips at http://thegreaterjacksonshrinkdown.com.