Ellington

Q. Please tell me why state troopers patrol and direct traffic for a Jackson church on North State Street (near Millsaps) during church service, and oftentimes now, a deputy sheriff. Isn't this a violation of church and state?

I've asked this question in the past but only get a mumbling about officers working during their off hours. If that is true, why the use of state or government vehicles? Are taxpayers paying for this? Why is it necessary for motorists to drive under the legal speed limit (as directed by the patrol officer) to get to our own church service? Thank you.
— Tormented Taxpayer

A. Hmmmm. I guess they're there because that's where the people and cars are. This reminds me of the question the acerbic writer/intellectual Gore Vidal asked Eudora Welty when he was visiting her late one Sunday morning a few years back. "Why are so many people around here going to church, Eudora?" To which, the ever-droll Eudora answered, "Well, Gore, it is Sunday."
I'm all for separation of church and state, but the only church-state connection I see here is that the church in question (First Pres) is on State (street). Public officers are paid to patrol public streets, aren't they? Try to think of it this way: They are there to protect you (and me) from hitting or being hit by a Presbyterian. I don't know about you, but I don't want to get in the way of a bunch of predestined people. And, what's more, I'd rather see a gaggle of cops than First Baptist's "Bridge of Sighs" any day.

Hot Pink Airbags

Q. What's the deal with gargantuan purple and hot pink inflated animals at car dealers? I much prefer the revolving searchlights myself.
— Curious But Not Buying in Byram

A. I think you do know the deal. As stupid looking as they are, you saw them and saw where they were coming from, didn't you? I never can figure out where a searchlight comes from. Granted, there are other possible explanations for why car dealers of their own free will choose these most asinine of attention-getters, but they are just too depressing for words.

Send your questions for JoAnne, whatever they may be, to , mail to PO Box 2047, Jackson, Miss., 39225, or fax to 866/728-4798 (toll free). Include name and daytime phone number, although it will be withheld.